Current mood:	confused
Current music:	Flash Gordon - Queen

My Heart Doesn't Just Want to Cuddle
Its time to step back. Its time to think. Its time to pause. Do I need space? Do I need..... WHAT DO I NEED?

Why am I so confused about this. Cut and dry, right?
No. Well then what the hell.
I promised, myself. At least I think I did. I broke all the rest of my promises. So why not this one too. What the hell, haven't I already broken it, and just am denying it??

ARRGGG: (excuse me moment of crazy ranting...as if the rest of this post wasn't already).
I want it, I don't want it, I don't care, I care, take heart, push back, take up the flag, move forward, be a man, take a break, focus on work, spend time with the cats, spend time out, hell go out and get drunk. Let go for once in life, can you ever lose control???? Why the hell can you just let go? Let someone else take advantage of you, for once. Fucking get a grip man. What the hell....you arn't even making sense now.

My mind on paper...well silicon. Scary picture...pure chaos. People ask why you worry so much. I have to point to the voices. The damn voices....my demons, my attonment for sins past. Can they ever be quiet. All this thinking and you still do stupid shit-brained stuff.

Did you really think you could swim in these waters? You are sinking fast, is it time to suck in the dark waters and let the crushing black take me?? Or is it time to fight for the surface??

Well I guess that narrows the choices. Go straight, or turn left.

So enought of the mind splurge? OK.

Honestly its been a great day....so why the drama, no one knows...not even me.

Tomorrow I start trying for a promotion in all honesty.
Set up meeting-
Find high visibility issue to attempt to change-
Hob-knob with managment-
Talk to Josh and Justin-
Set up meeting with Bill-
Get team to 1st.

Not to bad. Lets get to work.